Why Monogamous Couples Should Still Consider STD Testing

When you think of a monogamous relationship, you may automatically picture a relationship where you are both exclusive and intimate with each other. It is also typical to think that being in a monogamous relationship means either partner will not have a sexually transmitted disease (STD). After all, if you are not seeing anyone else - what is the risk? In fact, while it does lessen some risk, monogamy does NOT remove all risk. Many couples in London and across the UK, don't even realize that while they are in a monogamous relationship that there are still risks of STDs. This article highlights why even monogamous couples should think about being tested regularly for sexual health related purposes, and practical advice, while debunking some myths along the way.

Understanding STDs

Let’s start with the basics. STDs - or sexually transmitted infections (STIs), as they’re often called - are infections that can be spread from one person to another through sexual contact. In the UK, some of the most common STDs include chlamydia, gonorrhoea, syphilis, HIV, and herpes. They can be passed through vaginal, anal, or oral sex. These infections are particularly complex, because it is not always clear that you have them. For example, someone with chlamydia could be asymptomatic but still carry the infection. Data from Public Health England shows that the prevalence of STDs in the UK has risen over recent years, even among people in long-term relationships. Rates of gonorrhoea diagnoses alone, increased by 24% from 2018 to 2019. This data supports the adage, "No matter how long you have been in a relationship, or how committed, neglecting the sexual health of you and your partners can have dire implications."

Why Monogamous Couples Are Still at Risk

Now, you might be wondering, “How can I possibly get an STD if I’m only sleeping with my partner?” The answer lies in factors beyond your current relationship. One key reason is past sexual history. Before meeting your current partner, either of you may have been exposed to an STD without realising it. Since some infections can remain dormant for years, it’s entirely possible to carry - and unknowingly transmit - an infection despite being faithful now.

Another concern is undiagnosed infections. Not everyone gets tested regularly, especially before entering a new relationship. If one partner had an STD that was not treated prior to the start of the relationship, this can also affect both of you today. In addition to these earlier mentioned situations, there are rare situations where STD can be accidentally contracted through medical procedures, or through touching non-sexually infected fluid. Although these are rare incidences, it highlights how we should continue to be mindful.

Benefits of STD Testing for Committed Couples

Testing is not only about identifying issues, but it is also about protecting your future as a couple. It is good to know your status, and, more importantly, such knowledge provides peace of mind. There is something quite freeing about knowing your partner is healthy and, conversely, knowing what your health status is as well. It builds trust and helps the couple understand they are both committed to openness.

From a medical point of view, detection is key. So many STDs can cause deleterious impacts if one does not intervene. For instance, while chlamydia can leave men and women infertile, untreated syphilis can affect one’s heart and brain. When STDs are picked up early, an authority on health can begin treatment before potential complications arise.

Testing can facilitate conversations about sexual health. These discussions will feel uncomfortable initially, but that discomfort will help generate a deeper intimacy and mutual respect between partners. Importantly, by taking care of one's health, it creates a culture for public health that reduces the spread of STDs in the community.

Recommended Testing Frequency

If you’ve decided to take the plunge and get tested, the next question is: how often should you do it? For couples in the UK, experts recommend starting with a baseline test when you begin a new relationship. This initial screening helps establish both partners’ statuses and sets a precedent for prioritising sexual health.

After that, periodic check-ups every six to twelve months are advisable, depending on individual risk factors. For instance, if either partner has a history of unprotected sex or previous STDs, more frequent testing may be necessary. Common types of reproductive health examinations include tests for chlamydia, gonorrhoea, HIV, syphilis, and Hepatitis B and C. In some clinics there may also be additional testing available for rarer sexually transmitted infections, such as herpes or HPV, if requested.

In London, there are a variety of options for joint testing. This can include free, confidential testing through your local NHS sexual health clinic, private clinics where you can obtain results faster or with more privacy, or home testing kits where you take swabs at home and send them to be tested.

Talking to Your Partner About Testing

Talking to a partner about being tested for Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) can be awkward, but it doesn’t have to be. Frame the conversation positively, and keep the focus on a shared purpose. You might say, “We should get tested to make sure we both are healthy so that we can hang out without worrying," instead of, “I don’t trust you so we need to get tested." This is not about suspicion, it’s about caring for one another and being responsible.

You can also normalise testing by talking about STI testing as a part of routine healthcare, and put it in the same category as going to the dentist or having a blood pressure check. Remind your partner that everyone deserves to have a strong understanding of their health status, regardless of being in a relationship. If you come from a place of empathy and understanding, you are nurturing a healthy, responsible place to start a conversation regarding sensitive issues.

Myths and Misconceptions

Myths and misconceptions about STIs and monogamous relationships are prevalent. The biggest myths is that, since you are primarily in a committed relationship, sexual transmission risks and chance of being infected do not exist. As I mentioned in the history and context section, this simply is not true. Past exposures, undiagnosed infections, and unusual external factors may contribute (though the latter are rare).

Another misconception is that only those with multiple sexual partners can contract infections. Having multiple sexual partners does contribute to risk, but it is not the only factor. Someone (or anyone) in a lifelong sexually monogamous relationship could, under the right conditions, contract an infection regardless of the duration of their current relationship.

Some people choose not to test out of fear of knowing the results, or belief that their test will not be kept confidential. Keep in mind that any healthcare provider in the UK takes confidentiality and privacy very seriously. Whether a NHS clinic or private service, your information will be treated with utmost confidentiality. Remember...knowledge is power; the sooner you find out, the better you will be to deal with any possible infection you have.

Conclusion

Ultimately, putting sexual health first is not only about protecting yourself but also about caring for your relationship as well as a community-healthy society. Regular STD testing is a relatively quick and easy step every couple, whether monogamous or otherwise, should take. Not only does it develop trust and prevent complications, it also inspires conversations about health and safety; and these are conversations that must be had.

If you live in London, take control of your health today. Whether you book a private STD test in London or visit a sexual health service in your town, now is the perfect time to invest in your wellbeing. Love thrives best when built on trust, honesty, good intentions, and shared responsibility.